"I just don't think we're fair kind of people."

This weekend I went to the fair. And when I tell you I didn't have much fun, I mean to tell you it was the worst experience. First off, for anyone who may come across this little part of the internet and also just happens to live in Central Florida -  do not - DOOOO NOOOOTT waste your time or money going to the Central Florida Fair. 

It all started when I was admiring a blogger's pictures of her time at the fair down south. I was in love. I've never been a fair person (my family hated them so I grew up maybe going once or twice), and I've never really had much of a desire to go. But it looked like such a fun experience! I even Googled when a fair would be coming near me. 

I probably should've gone outside before deciding to go. I didn't know that it was in the 50's and the wind was crazy. That was my first problem. It was freezing (Hello, Florida girl born and raised) and uncomfortable to walk against the whipping wind. 

I paid eight smacks for a flat soda that I didn't drink because it was so gross and a piece of cold pizza that looked a day old (I couldn't even take a bite- it literally went straight into the garbage). 

We got stuck at the top of the ferris wheel where the cart we were in whipped back and forth at what I swear felt like 100mph winds. I even broke out into the Lord's prayer as I laid myself completely out on my side of the cart. I was ready to surrender to a higher power. The other two friends I was with went on a roller coaster that looked like one strong gust of wind was going to make it collapse. They came off of it looking like they survived a death trap. 

Nothing, and I really mean nothing at all like I imagined or fantasized about it. And to think I spent a small fortune getting in and eating (or not eating) makes me want to cry a little. BUT! I met a new friend and that was exciting. We also all had fried oreos for the first time ever and we all fell in love. 

We walked all over like we didn't have a clue. We were constantly told we were getting on a ride or getting out of a ride incorrectly. And even as we drove out to leave we were told we were going the wrong way. The only thing I could say was, "Well, I just don't think we're fair kind of people."

We had a go at it, fair. But it just didn't work out too well, and I'll probably never visit you again. But we tried, and that's all that matters. 

But classy girls don't kiss in bars, you fool.

Alright, 2012, looks like this is it. We rode it out for 365 days and now it's time for you to hit the road. Never to be seen again; bittersweet. Mostly, I think you and I had fun and lots and lots of learning.

In the beginning of the year I was set on creating the best year possible. I felt like the energy surrounding me was so thick with positivity. This was truly "my year".

In the spring I turned twenty-six and started to really panic. I was no longer in my "early to mid twenties". I can now be referred to as "late twenties" and I'm four years away from thirty. Which wouldn't be so terrifying if I felt like I had some direction to my life. Ha. We also needed to find ourselves a third room mate as the current one decided she was on her way to the big apple to move in with friends of our's that already lived there.

Summer came and it couldn't have been a rougher time for me. In the beginning of the year, I had decided I was at a point to let an old boyfriend back into my life as a good friend. Things got complicated when he asked me to move in with him (across country mind you) and then it unraveled and I realized I wasn't sure we knew how to be "just friends". Ever.  Shit was not fun to say the least. I learned a lot about myself though. We also said goodbye to our third room mate and welcomed a new friend into our home. I got more serious with a close friend about a fun little business adventure. Oh, and I took a new job position at work that made me feel less "stuck" within my company.

At the end of the summer, I finally said goodbye to that boy. I wasn't sure it would ever happen. It's been four years and a very, intimate deep seeded history with us. But I stood up for myself! Things even got a little  LOT crazy.  I learned to just let go. Not everyone is going to be open and honest in life, and sometimes people are going to believe lies, and that's gotta be OK with me. I know the truth. I know who I am. I learned not to attempt to overstep our good friend, Karma. Not everything is in my control nor should it be. Sometimes people don't work out. Not even as friends. Everything is OK.

I also learned about the passing of my Dad. That was a hard one. Learning to accept that I'll never get the chance to re-connect. This was huge for me. I learned that I can't keep thinking, "I have time". Because, well, I don't. We don't always have time. That is still a hard one to swallow. I miss him, but I feel him so strongly around me now. And that comforts me. It made me put a lot of things into perspective. I don't sweat the small things as much, and that little lesson about letting go from earlier really hit home. I felt like I was losing a lot this year. But gaining so much at the same time.

Fall came and went so quickly. I anticipated Ana's arrival back home. I felt like I was finally starting to get my groove back (hey, Stella). Life was great, I was loving it. Sunday Funday was a new tradition I started with Jackie and anticipated it every week. For the first time in my life I experienced Buyer's Remorse . And then Ana came home unexpectedly and tragically. While grieving for and with my best friend, I finally got news I had been searching for regarding my Dad and his passing.

With all the sadness returning and refusing to let it swallow me up, I went to my happy place. I also allowed myself to just be in the moment. Not thinking about before or after, but now. I stopped caring so much about what other's thought or may think about me, what I liked or wanted and just did it because I wanted to. I even let a boy in!

I truly did a lot of learning. I can honestly say I am leaving this year a lot lighter feeling. I am thankful and grateful for my experiences. I take something from it all. As I walk through 2012's door I'm not resentful or regretful. I had a lot of goodbye's this year I think it's because I have a lot of "hello"s waiting for me when I knock on 2013's door. And if I hadn't done all that learning and shedding, I wouldn't be able to.

2012, it's been an experience. But it's a block party after all, so it's time to move on over to 2013. I can drink to that.

Happy Hearts, 

Alex 

Happy Thanks.

It's Thanksgiving! I can't wait to eat my fair share of green bean casserole, sweet potato pie, and mashed potatoes.

• I am most thankful this year and every year for my Mother. She was my sole provider growing up. All we had was each other my entire childhood, and I cherish her for never giving up. For never making me feel like her job as a single Mother was too hard or too much of a burden. I am thankful that she allows me to be who I want to be, express how I feel, and believe what I feel is right and not only accept me, but support me and shower me with love. 

• I am thankful for my friendships. I don't have siblings, so many of my close friends are like the family. I am so thankful that these people are in my life. That we love and support each other and respect our friendship enough to never, ever let it fizzle. I am so thankful for the memories, the laughs, experiences, and lessons. 

• I am thankful for everything that I've gone through this year. The good, the bad, the ugly (and boring!). I have learned so many things from everything that has happened this year. I'm even thankful for the people I've said goodbye to this year. Even through the tears and tantrums - I. Am. Thankful. 

• Lastly, I am thankful for my body. So thankful. I mean, without it, I wouldn't be here! The fact that I could be so careless with it, and yet my little heart beats every single minute of every single day. Wow. Definitely need to make it a resolution to respect it more (I need to get my running shoes back on)!

Spending a day with family and a delicious feast and taking time to remember how thankful we are for everything and everyone in our lives is so lovely. But I think it's important to take some time as often as possible to celebrate what we're thankful for. Whether it's a brief moment between work phone calls and emails, or in the shower while washing your hair.

Happy Hearts,

Alex

It is understood that we did all we could.

Terrariums! We have terrariums all over the school I work at (I guess that's what happens when you work at an all natural hair school). So, that's where my inspiration first struck. Then of course, I saw something on Pinterest and it reminded me that I'd been wanting to make one for a while. One of my best friends were on a mission this weekend to make them. But I wanted mine to be cute and little. So naturally, I ended up making three because once I started I just couldn't stop! The one with the sea star in it is for my Mom. Her birthday is Wednesday and I never know what to get her. I think she'll really love this little jar of life. They were so easy peasy to make and I can't wait to make more. At the end of our crafty day, we still had some succulents left over and plenty of soil and moss so we took a late-night trip in search for more glass jars.

I decided I wanted my last one to be bigger. I wish I would've taken a better picture to display the cuteness of my succulents and their little environment. It's on my nightstand and I adore it.

Sunday was truly funday. I haven't had one of those in a long while. I got up earlier than usual (even after going to bed pretty late) and got dressed. The room mates, my best friend and I all headed to the farmer's market. We had delicious snacks and indulged in home made, crafty goods and enjoyed the sunshine (ugh, don't remind me that it's still steaming hot out though). We came home and had lunch and I went upstairs to veg out for a while before my friend came back over for our Sunday night line up!

I must admit I am addicted to the following: Once Upon a Time (!!!), Long Island Medium (hysterically cry every.single.episode.), and Breaking Amish (what the what! is this real?!). Also, anything Oprah, so of course Next Chapter. Sunday nights are busy around here, folks! And it's only going to get better when the best show ever returns aka THE WALKING DEAD. I get SO excited when it's mentioned.

It really was just this awesome, lovely, peaceful feeling this weekend. To have genuine fun with the ones I love. I didn't worry about work, what housework needed to be done (for once I'm caught up with laundry!), or those god-awful events that took place two weeks ago (not worth naming them;). I just lived in every little minute, soaked up the fun and loved every minute.

Even though it's still hot and humid in good ol' Florida, I'm loving being where I'm at. Having the sun shine on me and taking in the beauty. I wouldn't mind though if it decided to get somewhat breezy though. You hear that, Mother Nature? October weather never hurt anyone.

Oh, I also decided to spend a good chunk of time in Barnes and Noble reading everything that looked interesting. I got into Numerology and came home and decided to do more reading on my life path number. I get into stuff like that. I found out that I'm a 7. It was definitely an interesting read, and while not something to base your entire life on I do suggest it. I don't believe it defines us, but it's something to take into consideration. I know I found a lot of truth in what I read about myself and others I know.

Well, play time is over. Now it's back to the grind. Hello, Monday. Hope to see you soon Friday. :)

the night sky is changing overhead.

I've put a halt to going out so much. Mainly because I don't think every Saturday night needs to be spent drinking (dancing, yes). Sundays become a waste of a day because I'm either so tired from getting home so late, hungover or a mixture of both. It also hurts the wallet. But this past weekend I decided it was time to make my presence known again.

It was such a nice little group of friends. It always feels so nice to just be out with a group of friends who are out to have fun. The girls aren't concerned about guys and the guys aren't concerned about girls. We are just dancing the night away. Getting lost in the music and our laughter and fun. I did run into a girl from high school which was so great, and another friend came out to visit me at one of the bars we stopped into. It was just a great, great night.

At the end of the night we were going to hop over to another place before closing and our friend got distracted by a salon/retail store that was open. While we oh so patiently (read: not at all) waited on him I began to notice just all of the girls who were shuffling past us and they were... BAREFOOT. Yeah, did you cringe? Because every time I think about it, I do. Bare freaking foot. Makeup no longer fresh, dresses looking sweaty and disheveled and heels in hands. Walking on the street and sidewalks that are already disgusting but even worse with food, vomit, and the like that happens at 2am. Get the hell out of here!

One guy was on the curb, girl in lap, PASSED OUT. Not only were her shoes off and her feet were black with grime, but her legs were spread (hellllooo, vagine!) and her hands were all up on the sidewalk/road to keep herself from face planting. Why, ladies, whhhyyyy?? Listen, I cannot imagine going home with a guy and thinking I'm going to crawl into bed like that. Barf.

I just don't get it. If you can't walk in the heels for long periods of time, why bother? It does not look attractive or cute when you rip them off and opt to walk around with black, dirty feet downtown. Not to mention if you know you're one of those drunks who gets sloppy and can't handle yourself, why drink to that point? Who the hell are you impressing by stumbling, screaming, slurring, and puking everywhere?

Oh, girls. Stay classy.

P.s. Fall is here!! :) So here's a random picture! ;)

We're already 15 days into 2012!

Oh, my! It's been a while.  The holidays were lovely and ringing in the new year was great. I realize that with a new year comes a ton of (mostly unrealistic) resolutions. Also, "This is MY year!" or "This is THE year" all over social networking sites. I've sure been guilty of this. However, I kind of stopped doing it because I realized I was hyping myself up for a huge let down. And well, that can be a bummer.

BUT. I can honestly say I feel like there is a lot of positive energy surrounding 2012. Now, I'm not going to jinx myself with those crazy resolutions (I'm going to go the gym every day, volunteer three times a week & diet), but I am looking forward to a really great year. I feel like if anything spectacular is going to happen, this is going to be the year.

I started out just right by allowing people in my past to re-enter. Finally learning how to remember the past without holding a grudge or allowing it to bring back unhappy feelings. Allowing it to truly be a lesson and educate me and still being able to be open and connected to the other person without those harsh feelings attached. It's a lovely feeling.

I think this year I'm looking forward to being connected more to my friends, loved ones, and the Universe in general. So many of us are just walking through life like Zombies. Not being present in every moment. So, if I had to make a resolution and without it being something I know I can't obtain I suppose it would be to stop and smell those dang flowers.

Hello, 2012. Let's have a swell year. :)