Be true 'cause they'll lock you up in a sad, sad zoo.

I grew up on the beach. That's always been my happy place. When I needed time to just be alone with my thoughts I always retreated there. There's something so magical about the Ocean.  Whether you're happy, sad, indifferent. There's just this calm that comes over you and you realize you're not alone. The Universe as huge as it is, is right there by your side. Putting things into perspective. I just love it.

Living in Orlando I don't have the luxury of taking a five or ten minute stroll down to the Ocean to just take it all in. But I have something close to it.... Disney World! ;)

I don't care how old I am, I don't think anyone is ever too old for Disney.

The end of this week has been a rough one on my spirits. Dealing with my Dad has been hard for sure. It comes in spurts. One minute I'm fine and the next I'm drowning myself in unhappy, sad thoughts and I'm breaking down. And that boy I said goodbye to a month or so ago? Yeah, he came back with a vengeance and I've been dealing with that on my end. I asked him not to and he insisted texting me.

I torched any kind of relationship to the ground and with no signs of it ever resurrecting. And that's hard. Because I tried to bow out gracefully. I tried to leave the crazy out and just be peaceful and calm. It didn't have to end for good, just for a little while I kept telling him and myself.  He didn't want it to end for good, I told him it wouldn't, I just needed space. Oh. It ended for good. And I'm sad to say it ended with me basically lighting a match and torching it while I walked away with said "friendship" in flames behind me. Don't look back, Alex. Just don't look back, and don't dare shed a tear. Stand tall, stand strong.

I found myself listening to Ellie Goulding and I closed my eyes and just started swaying. Before I knew I was full on dancing and crying. "I feel you, Dad. I know you're with me" I whispered. I really do believe that. But I need some happy today. Today I need to just forget about it all.  I'm sick of these melancholy days.

So, here's to the happiest place on Earth! Disney, here I come! :)